An unbreakable bond

If there was one thing that was so obvious about Addison's baby home, it was how much the caregivers adored those kids. It was easy to see that their connection to the kids went far beyond someone who just took care of their daily needs. While I know they are happy to see the kids be adopted, I can't imagine how hard it must be for some of them when children they have bonded with leave the baby home forever. We owe everything to Addison's caregivers ... they have held her life in their hands for the past two years and I must say they have held on tight. Addison is doing extremely well and for that we are extremely thankful. I'm not quite sure what we did to deserve her, but we thank God every day.

USCIS: Approved!

When we got home from Russia yesterday, our I-171H from USCIS {U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services} was waiting for us!

Date application filed: June 5, 2008

Date of completion of advance processing: September 22, 2008

What is an I-171H, you ask? It is a notice of favorable determination concerning an application for advance processing of an orphan petition ... we finally received it! We have been approved for one child with special needs. Yep, that sounds about right!

Check, check, check ... just waiting on Russia!

We are home ...

We made it home safe and sound earlier this afternoon. It was so great to see the kids ... we missed them so much! We are both exhausted ... our bodies are operating eight hours ahead right now. I still have so much to blog about from our trip ... sigh, maybe tomorrow. LOL.

Visiting Peterhof

Andrei took us to Peterhof ... a series of fountains and gardens that Peter the Great ordered be built. It is often referred to as the "Russian Versailles" and it is absolutely gorgeous! If you are ever going to be in St. Pete, definitely take the time to go there. It takes about a half hour to get there from the city, but as you can see from the pictures ... it is so worth it!

Below you see the Grand Palace behind us and the canal you see runs from the fountains all the way into the Gulf of Finland. There are over 200 fountains throughout the grounds of Peterhof ... and, there is no electricity involved. Every fountain operates using gravity and some pressurized pipe system {err something}. It is amazing!

The East Chapel ... the gold you see on the chapel is real gold ... it is amazing how shiny it continues to be, even after being weathered ... I guess that is because it is gold! LOL. Stop laughing at me, I really am smart most times.Some of the fountains throughout the grounds ...

There is old tradition surrounding this tree fountain ... it is believed that when you step on certain stones surrounding the outskirts of the fountain, that you will get sprayed from behind {in the trees nearby}. Truth be told, there is an outhouse size building in the trees, and there is a person in the outhouse that sprays the water when people step on the "certain stones". There were a couple of little kids doing it when we were there ... it was adorable ... and they were soaked!

There are identical fountains of Adam and Eve on either side of Peterhof {there is a right side and a left side that each span for a mile or so} ... here is Adam ...Peterhof is built along the shore of the Gulf of Finland ... this is a {far away} view of St. Pete from Peterhof ...

Saying Goodbye

We got to spend just two hours with Addison this morning. I was a mess going into it ... and Kyle and I both were messes going out of it. We both cried and tried not to look at each other so as to not make the other cry more. The caregiver quickly took Addison from us {to make it easier, I suppose} and told us {translated from Russian} not to cry, that we would be back before we know it. While we know that is true, it is still so very hard.

We had a great visit with Addison, but the two hours we had seemed like five minutes. Addison has a cold and I think it is getting worse. My mommy instinct just wants to get her better NOW, but alas I will have the rest of her life to get her better. I'm determined to learn some Russian, because her receptive language {in Russian} is incredible ... you can just see the difference in her face when they talk to her in Russian ... it is so cute! If anyone has any good tips for learning key phrases quick, let me know! LOL.

I never imagined in my entire life that we would make this kind of connection with a child after just three days. I think it is because she reminds us so much of Payton ... and obviously our love for Payton it so strong it makes our hearts hurt. Many people are afraid of adoption because they are not sure if they could love a child that isn't theirs the same way that they do their own. I have been curious as to how I would feel once we were put in the situation, but I now know that we are living proof that it is one in the same. Becoming the parents of a child that has no mommy or daddy ... a child that just wants to be loved by a family ... being able to do that is an incredible feeling.

Until next time ...

I need some inspiration here ...

... because I can't stop the tears from falling. It is 8 a.m. on the day that we are to leave Russia. In two hours we go to the baby home to say goodbye to our daughter. The bond that we have formed over three short days is absolutely indescribable ... words cannot describe it. I have kept it together this week by not thinking about the goodbye, and now I'm staring it in the face. Some words of inspiration would be most appreciated. I don't want to go to the baby home a blubbering mess ... but what else am I to do? This has got to be one of the worst feelings in the world.

Not a happy camper

Today we took Addison to the photography studio to have a quick picture taken for her passport. Side note: Wow, that is really exciting to say ... she is getting a passport to come home with us! Back on track: Needless to say, she hated the car seat. Umm ... hated might not even be the word? She screamed ... although that was the first time we had heard her cry, so it was so cute ... and sad, at the same time. She wanted nothing to do with being buckled in that seat and reached for us to take her out. We assume that the only association she has with cars is going to the doctor's office, which probably in her mind is a negative association because of shots. :( She finally calmed down {after Andrei talked some Russian to her} and enjoyed the view. Yikes ... we may have our work cut out for us when we get her home. Anybody got any Russian CD's I can play in the car to soothe her? LOL. Hopefully soon enough she will understand what I'm saying to her and life will be good. ;)

Baby Home 13 {... and the kids}

The kids at Addison's baby home are split into family units, for lack of a better term. When you walk down the hallways of the baby home, all you see are a lot of closed doors. Behind each of those doors are family units. Addison's family unit has three rooms {one room with cribs and two play rooms with tables and chairs for eating ... oh, and a bathroom}. Within those three rooms the family unit is split once more, I believe into two groups of four kids, mostly just for meal time, from what I can tell. The kids in Addison's family unit range from a few months old to four years of age. After the kids turn four, they are transferred to homes for older kids or if they are incapacitated, they are transferred to institutions.

We have spent a lot of time with Addison's family unit. All of the kids call us mama and papa ... it is so heartbreaking! However, at the same time, all of the kids know that we are there for Nika {short for Veronika}, as they so affectionately call her. This morning when we got to the baby home, we saw some of the kids from Addison's family unit going out to play. Every single one of them told our translator in Russian that Nika was upstairs ... they knew who we were and they knew we were coming for her. That just breaks my heart that these two and three year olds know that there are mommies and daddies that come for some of the kids, but that their parents have yet to come. They absolutely crave your attention and if you pay them attention, it is hard to break away because they crave it so badly. I wish there was more that I could do ... what can you do to help? ;)

The Church of Our Savior on the Spilled Blood

We had a chance to go back to The Church of Our Savior on the Spilled Blood so that we could see the inside. Wow ... it is SO beautiful and amazing! All of the images in the church are put together with tiny mosaic tiles ... they are not painted ...
I believe I previously mentioned that the church got its name because it was built on the spot that Alexander II was assassinated. He was assassinated along a canal, and the canal was rerouted so that the actual spot of his assassination was kept in tact ... down to the handrail for the canal.

Here is the memorial that encloses the actual street stones and the handrail ... isn't that amazing?

Here is the canal right outside the church ... you can see where they had to build into the canal in order to restore the assassination spot. Also, each canal in St. Petersburg has a unique rail, so you can see here how the rail in the church memorial matches the rail outside ...This is the largest dome of the church ... the four smaller domes depict separate images of Jesus Christ throughout his life ...You can sort of see one of the smaller domes in this picture ...

The entire floor of the church looks like this ... it is all Italian marble ...

Q & A {and some stats}

Did you bring clothes for her?
No, that is the one thing I totally forgot! Everything she is wearing belongs to the baby home ... the little boy's snowsuit, the hats, the Bob the Builder tennis shoes ... LOL. Sigh. Those who know me well know that it is killing me that I can't dress her or do her hair yet. :) The snowsuit, however, is 12-18M and it is too small, so I think we'll be bringing 18-24M clothes for her when we return. Oh, and we traced her feet on paper so we know what size shoes to bring.

What is your apartment like?
Ahh ... I'm sorry ... I've had so much to blog about and so little time! I will try to do this today ... I still have to take pictures! ;) Our driver picks us up at 10AM and we don't get back to the apartment until about 5:30PM, at which point we leave again for dinner ... so by the time we get back and I get to blogging, it gets late! LOL.

You may have answered this but when do you go back? And do you have to leave and go back again? Or do you take her home that time?
We don't yet know when we will be back, probably sometime in November. We have to wait for our paperwork to be processed in Moscow and then we have to wait for the judge to fit us into her schedule. Luckily there are no huge Russian holidays in November where the judge will be gone for a long period of time, because that can set things back. We are being told the average time between trips right now is 6-8 weeks. When we come back, we will have court right away. At court, they typically impose a 10 day waiting period during which you can either go home or stay in country and continue to visit your child at the baby home. We are hopeful that our 10 days will be waived, but that remains to be seen. I'm not sure yet what we will do if it isn't waived. After the 10 days, we will hop the overnight train to Moscow. We have to go there to get Addison cleared through the embassy and then we fly home out of Moscow.

***

I just checked my statcounter because the map on the bottom of my blog is never correct, so I was curious as to just how many people are reading right now. Wow!

Tuesday: 510 different people {315 of them had never been to my blog before}

Wednesday: 852 different people {582 of them had never been to my blog before}

Thursday: 876 different people {564 of them had never been to my blog before}

So that leaves me wondering ... who are you and how did you hear about my blog? ;) LOL ... I get to be nosy too!

We agree!

Today we officially signed our referral papers, meaning we "agree" to pursue the adoption of Veronika. That is how it legally works. So ... in case you haven't had a chance to get acquainted ... meet the soon-to-be newest member of our family ... Addison Veronika!

Taking it a level deeper

Today was a great day ... even more so than yesterday. Our first day here, Tuesday, was a bit emotional for me. As soon as we got here, we were shown relinquishment letters handwritten by Addison's birth parents and that just made me really emotional. Going through this whole process, you tend to forget that this child came from another place. She really did belong to someone prior to being placed in the baby home.

Going into Wednesday, I think I was so nervous at how things would happen, that my emotions were frozen. I felt like I was discussing and meeting someone else's child. Not sure how else to explain it. So no, I did not cry when I first met her. Granted, I didn't cry when I gave birth to my two kids either. My emotions don't work well under stress ... but man, when the stress leaves, my emotions work on over drive. LOL. Nonetheless, we were completely smitten with Addison yesterday ... and even more so today!

Today we were able to just relax and get to know her a little more. Although having two people trying to bond with one child can be tough ... we did a lot of passing back and forth. It is also really hard knowing that we have to leave her here in a few days and I'm trying to not let that control my emotions. Knowing you are going to hurt ... well of course you try to guard that. I didn't think I'd have that hard of a time with it because I know she is in a great baby home and she is genuinely happy there ... but, I guess none of that matters when it is your child. Sigh.

All of that aside ... Addison is just amazing! When we arrived at the baby home this morning, she was outside on the playground sitting in a stroller. She totally recognized us and put her arms up for me to pick her up ... so cute! She does the cutest things ... my favorite of which is sucking on her two fingers and just nuzzling her head into your shoulder ... my heart melted every time.

Here she is sleeping on the momma ...

And also on the poppa ... she was tuckered out today!

Wednesday Evening

Last night {Wednesday} we went to eat at Sbarro {I know, I know ... again ... real ethnic} with another couple that is adopting a little boy from another baby home. They are from Pittsburgh and it was so nice to sit down with someone who could speak English! On our way back from Sbarro, we passed this department store, which Andrei said was the largest department store in Russia. The picture shows the entire length of the store, all the way to the very left of the picture. Craziness! We walked through the store and it was set up so strange ... sort of like mini-shops within the store. Each shop had walls to separate it from the next, as well as its own cash register. It is really hard to explain, but it was very unique ...

Nevksy at night {this is the area that our apartment is in}...

This is Alexandriinsky Theater that is near our apartment ... I just thought it was so pretty at night ...

Statue of Catherine the Great ...

Quirky things we have noticed ...

*We can buy a 2 liter bottle of water for $1

*Kyle thinks that you ask someone if they speak English by just approaching them, tilting your head and saying, "English?" ROFL. {Edited by Kyle to add: While this technique may not seem appropriate, I've gotten what I wanted and needed ... while Bethany has not. *snicker*}

*There are so many people who get married on any given day. I know I mentioned this before {I think}, but seriously ... at any given tourist site, you will see numerous bridal parties taking pictures. On a Wednesday, on a Thursday ... it doesn't matter. And ... the maid of honor and the best man are denoted by wearing what looks like a pageant sash.

*If you don't have a small car in this city, you will never make it. Our driver has squeezed through the smallest places I've ever seen ... and parked in the craziest places I've ever seen. Even I wouldn't do that at home!

*There are pizza joints everywhere ... pretty much we have eaten a lot of pizza.

*When you go into a convenience store or a pharmacy or whatever, you cannot just hand pick the items you want and take them to a cash register. Everything is behind a counter or behind a window ... which makes it a little hard for those of us that can't speak Russian.

*A lot of people smoke here. You smell smoke everywhere you go.

*All the young girls wear skinny {and I mean SKINNY} jeans with pumps.

*I think the mullet is coming back in style.

*They have Pepsi Light, not Diet Pepsi ... and it pretty much tastes the same as the regular Pepsi.

Ms. Addison

Very interesting article

In searching the internet for any information I could find about the baby home that Addison is in, I found an article that talks about a study done by PITT involving her baby home. Essentially in 2004 (perhaps even earlier), the US Government funded a project to reform the baby homes in St. Petersburg, and Baby Home 13 (Addison's baby home) was the focus of the reform on a trial basis. They instituted policies to make the baby home an environment that is similar to being raised in an American home. This is very promising ... no wonder we've been so impressed with everything. Yay!

Click here to read the article ...

Wordless Wednesday: Part II

Touring St. Petersburg, Russia

After our visit with Veronika {aka: Addison Veronika ... the name we will give her} this morning, our driver/translator, Andrei, took us sight seeing. Andrei, by the way, is an awesome tour guide! He speaks perfect English and is so knowledgeable! On to the sights ... I will try my best to identify them correctly! LOL.

First stop ... The Church of Our Savior on the Spilled Blood ... this church was built on the spot where Alexander II was assassinated ... it is absolutely gorgeous. The church was closed today, but we will return to see the inside at some point.
This picture is of the one section of the outside of the church that was not restored after WWII. See the marks all over from the bullets? Isn't that amazing?

Mikhailovsky Palace {translates to Michael's Palace}

There are canals all over St. Petersburg ... they are so cool! Here is one ...
Part of the Hermitage ... on display here is one of the oldest art galleries in the world ...

Winter Palace, which is also part of the Hermitage ... this palace was first occupied by Catherine the Great ...

This statue {name, anyone?} is in the common area in front of Winter Palace ... Andrei told us that it is free standing and it not attached to its base ... gravity apparently does the trick ... scary, eh? He said the locals joke not to walk too close to it on windy days ... ummm, I agree!
This is the Second Hermitage {err ... something like that} ... a building that Catherine the Great ordered be built because she couldn't fit all her art in the Winter Palace ...
Another canal ... with a bride and a groom ... we saw people all over the city being married today and taking pictures at all the historic places ... that was so amazing! Andrei said people get married all days of the week here, not just on Saturday like most Americans do ...

And yet another canal ... the apartment buildings on the left are among the most expensive in the city ... each probably runs about 1.5 million, according to Andrei ...

St. Patrick's Cathedral ... we got to go inside and it was amazing! No photos allowed, though ...
The bell tower ...